From Anxiety to Confidence – the Secret of Women’s Emotional Health Revealed by Psychology

Women in Hong Kong face the challenge of juggling multiple roles as the society transforms. Their stress comes from their pursuit of personal achievements in the workplace and the responsibility of taking care of their families. Dr. Kitty Wu, Clinical Psychologist, described modern women as “Domestic Engineers” who might encounter difficulties when they are pursuing stability and happiness. These challenges include social expectations, career demands, maintaining family relationships, and self worth. Therefore, women need to identify suitable ways to relieve stress to maintain psychological and mental well-being.

Women as Multigenerational Caregivers

Dr. Wu indicated that women’s unique physical structures, reacting to different life stages, will naturally bring out various physiological and mental health issues related to childbirth and menopause. At the same time, modern society has been evolving towards intelligence and digitalization, coupled with the advocacy of global gender equality. Women, enjoying significantly improved social status, remuneration, and education, are offered more choices in careers and roles. “The diverse roles of women, however, can be a motivation, yet it can also be a source of pressure,” she pointed out. One of the most prominent roles is a ‘multigenerational caregiver,’ where modern women may have to take care of several generations of family members, including grandparents, parents, husband, and children.

Dr. Kitty Wu, Clinical Psychologist, described modern women as “Domestic Engineers”.

Dr. Wu continued, “Women are inherently endowed with maternal instincts, and their stronger language development compared to men makes them adept at listening and communication. Traditionally, they have often shouldered the role of caregivers. With modern medical advancements and prolonged life expectancy, today’s women may have to look after family members across three to four generations, including their husbands and children, parents, and grandparents. Additionally, children’s increased educational standard inevitably imposes more stress on parents, as they need to acquire more knowledge and skills to educate the next generation to cope with a highly competitive society. When a woman pursues self-fulfilment while efficiently managing pressures from life, family, and societal expectations, she must carefully balance all aspects. Otherwise, her physical and mental health, as well as her overall quality of life, could be considerably impacted.”

Personal Expectations and Sense of Responsibility

It is generally believed that the stress comes from the external world, such as traditional society, working environment, family members, and others’ misunderstandings. But Dr. Wu revealed that it is possible that it is “inside out”, originating from oneself. “We found that the source of stress for women with depression or anxiety often comes from personal expectations and a sense of responsibility. They always judge themselves for not being good enough and demand personal perfection. Some working moms, for example, set strict rules for themselves, such as making sure the family has dinner at 7PM, the children must brush their teeth by 9PM, and go to bed half an hour later. Even if their husbands or family members help with dishwashing after meals, they often feel that the dishes are not clean enough unless they wash them again themselves. These obsessive thoughts and behaviours can easily cause significant mental stress and family conflicts to themselves and their families.’”

Moderate stress can be motivating, but excessive stress may lead to common mental disorders, such as low mood, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders, as well as physical discomforts like headaches, muscle tension, and shoulder and neck pain. In general, women are more prone to these symptoms than men. There are also more women patients receiving treatment for mental disorders.

Dr. Wu suggested three strategies for women to ease their physical and mental health issues on a personal level: 1. Changing mindset, 2. Developing interests, 3.Reseve ‘Me Time’ for oneself.

Support women's mental health

Dr. Wu suggested three strategies for women to ease their physical and mental health issues on a personal level. “The first strategy is changing mindset. When a woman starts to feel tired of any role, she needs to pause, review, and adjust her position. Achieving balance is the only way she can find the motivation to be successful in more roles and responsibilities. Secondly, developing interests and learning new things as knowledge is power, which enriches life and boosts self-confidence. Last but not least, reserve ‘Me Time’ for oneself, which could include resting, exercising, and practicing breathing techniques.”